*

yuihatano

  • *
  • Fresh Petal
  • 11 1
  • Lao Auntie
    • View Profile
Been in this discussion with male colleagues, friends and SO. It seems their consensus was that wedding is a waste of time and money and both party should split 50:50 given the current rates of hotel banquet. I am aghast. Why should us women be paying half when it's supposed to be a gift by the groom's parents? What do you all think? Should we pay half?

If the guy is unwilling to pay 100%, should I still say yes to his proposal?
To conquer a nation, first disarm its citizens.

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #1 on: March 20, 2018, 04:28:23 pm »
I will sacrifice my left nut and right kidney to marry yui hatano .... paying 100% for wedding banquet is peanuts man .....
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."

*

wangxinling

  • **
  • Junior Petal
  • 162 6
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2018, 02:31:32 pm »

If the guy is unwilling to pay 100%, should I still say yes to his proposal?

u want a marriage or a wedding?
if u want a marriage, why would u care he paying 100% or 0%.
Everything in a married life belongs to both partners

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2018, 10:56:20 pm »
u want a marriage or a wedding?
if u want a marriage, why would u care he paying 100% or 0%.
Everything in a married life belongs to both partners

Yup ..... i told my wifey that she should pay for all the groceries, utilities, maintenance and petrol .... 8)
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."


*

Bluah

  • **
  • Junior Petal
  • 122 2
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #4 on: March 22, 2018, 12:25:20 am »

*

happyshar

  • ****
  • Senior Petal
  • 3037 19
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #5 on: March 22, 2018, 07:11:42 pm »
Lol... Y not?
Wedding is only one day
Marriage is a lifetime

What are his reasons depending

Wedding banquet is highly marketed actually, don't like the idea of entertaining guests plus long  lost relatives, good weather friends etcetc. The money can be better spend tgt elsewhere than in a one day event where both parties are reluctant n hv to patronize others.

And when I'm a guest of wedding lunch / dinner events I can't wait to leave lol. Can imagine being held up during the cosy weekends just to be present for a few hours event where you are stuck.

In fact we just wna ROM only, just hope that my parents ok lol.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2018, 07:26:24 pm by happyshar »
没有心,就不会痛 😉

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #6 on: March 22, 2018, 08:44:40 pm »
It is laughable or even comical that Singapore is a place where wedding guests pay for their own dinners to celebrate a couple's wedding ...
 ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."

*

happyshar

  • ****
  • Senior Petal
  • 3037 19
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #7 on: March 23, 2018, 02:02:20 am »
Oh yeahor, and the 100 - 200 can be better spent elsewhere  ???

Sommore adults behaving like monkeys during gatecrash.. lol
没有心,就不会痛 😉

*

Irene Kuok

  • ******
  • Administrator
  • 200 7
  • Wandering Happily!
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #8 on: March 24, 2018, 12:40:56 pm »
Actually, 50/50 is pretty common.

In fact many women these days are more capable than guys. Honestly, I've more savings than my husband. He has no money sense, but that doesn't mean he is bad or unwilling to pay more. But probably this is at his downtime of life. I find that as a girlfriend, I should trust and understand. I would think that it's a challenge for me to pay more in wedding, we fought we quarrelled over money and it's normal. But we worked through it.

I would say for your case, maybe you can decide to say no if the guy asks you to pay 100% or more than 50%, no matter if it's not willingly or not capable enough. Because, if you ask most girls their answer will most likely say "the guy is not ready". They have got a point there.

But it all depends on you, how much you trust this guy, how much you think he can make your marriage a better one and so on. A man who can pay a wedding 100% does not mean he can give you true happiness. True, is from the heart... not from the wallet.

Of course, if you say traditional wedding. Yes, no money no need get marry. But now it's a different society.

While you are thinking for him, think for yourself too. And if you love him, while you are thinking for yourself, think for him too.

Hope it helps, and hope my straightforward-ness didn't hurt. ;D :D ;) :)
Irene Kuok
_____
Irene's Makan Adventure: http://sgfoodwanderers.blogspot.sg |
Irene wander the Good Stuff in Singapore!: http://goods-wanderers.blogspot.sg/ |
 Join me wander someday. Follow me on Google+ , Instagram & Facebook @ FOODWANDERERS

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #9 on: March 25, 2018, 05:00:10 pm »
Yup. True .... last time unker also very poor. Cannot afford to hold traditional chinese banquet wedding at Sentosa or MBS  ....  :-[ :-[ :-[

Key question to ask yourself is this:
Are you looking for the right partner? Or
Are you trying to be the right partner....

Many sinkie gals are  looking for the right partner but they are not trying to be the right partner ....

You need to be inward looking first before you can be outward looking.

"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."

*

lilybythebay

  • *
  • Fresh Petal
  • 43 3
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #10 on: March 26, 2018, 10:22:18 am »
Actually, 50/50 is pretty common.
In fact many women these days are more capable than guys. Honestly, I've more savings than my husband. He has no money sense, but that doesn't mean he is bad or unwilling to pay more.

heh your hubby is so lucky!! hope his money sense improve after wedding. This is what i heard from friends, usually after wedding, the guy financial quotation improved a lot

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #11 on: March 26, 2018, 10:34:52 am »
heh your hubby is so lucky!! hope his money sense improve after wedding. This is what i heard from friends, usually after wedding, the guy financial quotation improved a lot

what is "financial quotation"?  you mean financial quotient? :P :P :P

actually I don't believe that a guy's financial quotient will improve after marriage.

if anyone is holding out the hope that the partner will be a better man or woman after marriage is in for a reality check. 

if he/she were a spendthrift or has a propensity to cheat,  why would he/she change after signing on a piece of paper? 

never mistake alarm bells for wedding bells ..... if you do,  better get your ears checked.
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."

*

princessbell

  • **
  • Junior Petal
  • 67 14
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #12 on: April 18, 2018, 05:40:16 pm »
Think most important is loves between both of you. If both of you are really in love, why not?

*

princessbell

  • **
  • Junior Petal
  • 67 14
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #13 on: July 11, 2018, 02:49:40 pm »
Yup ..... i told my wifey that she should pay for all the groceries, utilities, maintenance and petrol .... 8)
ture love is more important :)

*

beaverjuice

  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • 9177 18
  • Road to Perdition
    • View Profile
Re: If a men unwilling to pay for wedding, should I still say yes?
« Reply #14 on: July 11, 2018, 04:04:27 pm »
ture love is more important :)

..... and then i have to sleep in dog-house  :'(
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."