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Bubzberries

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What are we?
« on: August 25, 2016, 01:43:25 am »
Recently a man still pending to divorce told me he likes me and I do not deny the fact I began to like him. However, things  proceed a little too fast for us and I started to ask what does he treats me as? He avoided the questions and he would text me Everyday and night. I have no idea what is he thinking or treating me as, neither do I wanna be his fwb. He did told me about his fear in getting into relationship.

I do not know what am I expecting, perhaps I don wanna be his fwb or fling but something further?

Please advise.

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beaverjuice

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2016, 03:57:02 am »
U mean as in status? ???

Ask him to show you his deed of separation. If he can't show you that, then you are the 3rd party if you progress things with him ie. u are the adulteress.

Meanwhile kiap your legs tight tight okies...  :-*
"A man who has depths in his shame meets his destiny and his delicate decisions upon paths which few ever reach."

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happyshar

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2016, 03:57:45 am »
Recently a man still pending to divorce told me he likes me and I do not deny the fact I began to like him. However, things  proceed a little too fast for us and I started to ask what does he treats me as? He avoided the questions and he would text me Everyday and night. I have no idea what is he thinking or treating me as, neither do I wanna be his fwb. He did told me about his fear in getting into relationship.

I do not know what am I expecting, perhaps I don wanna be his fwb or fling but something further?

Please advise.

sounds unavailable
没有心,就不会痛 😉

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MiaMia

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2016, 09:03:40 am »
I do not know what am I expecting, perhaps I don wanna be his fwb or fling but something further?

babe, we can't advise you if you don't even know what you want from him.  :-\


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chiasmus

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2016, 09:05:42 am »
He did told me about his fear in getting into relationship.
Whatever it is, he is emotionally vulnerable/unstable/ambivalent at the moment.  He might be looking for someone to lean on emotionally and could also be using physical intimacy to feel more secure emotionally.

Ask him to show you his deed of separation. If he can't show you that, then you are the 3rd party if you progress things with him ie. u are the adulteress.
+1
洪荒之力 >> ding ding dong dong pew pew pew pew

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Piglet

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2016, 09:45:37 am »
never believe a guy word. of cos woman word also cannot be trust. like uncle bj say he need to show u prove he alrdy separated.

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Bubzberries

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2016, 10:47:45 am »
Whatever it is, he is emotionally vulnerable/unstable/ambivalent at the moment.  He might be looking for someone to lean on emotionally and could also be using physical intimacy to feel more secure emotionally.
+1

Yes, I think, perhaps i wanna have something further more than a friend, but yet i do not wish to frighten him off that i am clingy or that i am rushing him to get into relationship, neither do i wish the relation status to be 'unknown'.

he did told me he felt he is not ready for relationship as he hasnt divorce officially, as well he find it is hard to commit in relationship or marriage again.

Show me his deed of separation, i think it is not so nice to ask him to show me when we are not anything at this moment.

we no longer talk as much as before ever since i asked him 3x what is he treating me as, apparently he could not answer me, and tried to avoid answering. He will try to text me everyday as well. And, this is really making me confuse.


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poo42

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2016, 11:12:04 am »
You are nothing to him until he is willing to commit.

Now he is not even "free" either mentally or physically to be with you. Why get involved in this kind of situation?

He might just be making use of u as an emotional support or as a listening ear while he is going through a difficult phase in life.

Things won't turn out well for u either if u demand something that he is not capable or willing to give...

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chiasmus

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2016, 11:18:18 am »
Show me his deed of separation, i think it is not so nice to ask him to show me when we are not anything at this moment.
You have to understand that 'pending divorce' is just words and there is a chance that it might be 'pending forever'.
洪荒之力 >> ding ding dong dong pew pew pew pew

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MiaMia

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2016, 11:38:33 am »
He might just be making use of u as an emotional support or as a listening ear while he is going through a difficult phase in life.

or he might just be using TS as an ego-booster.
his current marriage is failing, but actually he still has 'market value' one, can hook up ladies if he wants to?

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Bubzberries

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2016, 11:54:56 am »
You are nothing to him until he is willing to commit.

Now he is not even "free" either mentally or physically to be with you. Why get involved in this kind of situation?

He might just be making use of u as an emotional support or as a listening ear while he is going through a difficult phase in life.

Things won't turn out well for u either if u demand something that he is not capable or willing to give...

Yes i am aware of it. i tried not to be the one initiating anything be it text or meet up. He told me he has separated for 2years, i do not wanna ask him too much of his issue or see his separation deed.


i know things wont turn out well for me if he is unable to give me anything, but i guess all i want to know was what he is treating me as? I do not like the mixed sign,


You have to understand that 'pending divorce' is just words and there is a chance that it might be 'pending forever'.

"Pending forever", yes i understand it might if one is not divorce officially. But, i cannot force or get anything out from it.


or he might just be using TS as an ego-booster.
his current marriage is failing, but actually he still has 'market value' one, can hook up ladies if he wants to?

Yes i do feel he has 'market value', that is the reason why i have no idea why he like or interested in me? or if i am just a passer by to him?


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MiaMia

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2016, 11:57:37 am »
Yes i do feel he has 'market value', that is the reason why i have no idea why he like or interested in me? or if i am just a passer by to him?

if he's the least bit serious about getting things to work with you, he wouldn't be playing dumb and refusing to answer you when you asked him what do are you to him.

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Bubzberries

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #12 on: August 25, 2016, 12:03:52 pm »
if he's the least bit serious about getting things to work with you, he wouldn't be playing dumb and refusing to answer you when you asked him what do are you to him.

He did mentioned to me that, he is afraid of committing into relationship after failure... He just said he likes me.

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MiaMia

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #13 on: August 25, 2016, 12:14:27 pm »
He did mentioned to me that, he is afraid of committing into relationship after failure... He just said he likes me.

he has made it obvious that he will not stay committed to you. if what you want is a stable r/s, you shld look elsewhere.

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Rosebudd

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Re: What are we?
« Reply #14 on: August 25, 2016, 12:16:21 pm »
Recently a man still pending to divorce told me he likes me and I do not deny the fact I began to like him. However, things  proceed a little too fast for us and I started to ask what does he treats me as? He avoided the questions and he would text me Everyday and night. I have no idea what is he thinking or treating me as, neither do I wanna be his fwb. He did told me about his fear in getting into relationship.

I do not know what am I expecting, perhaps I don wanna be his fwb or fling but something further?

Please advise.

you may not like my answer but..
get the hell out of it.
NOW.